Thursday Thoughts - Observations

Some of the same people, who want to "redefine" what marriage is, have a problem with the multi-wife situation in the new reality show Sister Wives.  What's the big deal?  The family members seem committed to each other and everyone seems pretty happy, including the kids, and there appears to be no child brides/child abuse.  Now they are being investigated by law enforcement because they might be breaking some laws, even though it is reported that the husband is only legally married to one woman. Apparently in Utah there is a law that includes co-habitation as polygamy. (Watch out all you college kids sharing that house.)



Do I understand this type of relationship?  Would I ever be involved in a marriage like that?  Nope, but I also wouldn't marry someone of the same sex either.

Everyone should be able to marry whomever they want; it's no one else's business.  The only thing I object to is the government requiring a license to marry and extending special benefits not afforded to single people.  Marriage is a religious institution and should stay within those confines and should not be given preferential treatment, regulated, or defined by government.

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Speaking of religion, you probably all heard of the Pew Forum Quiz on religion in American.  Atheists and agnostics scored higher in religious knowledge than white Protestants- 20.9 out of 32 questions. Jews and Mormons came in second and third.

Forty-five percent of Catholics didn't know that the church believes communion wafers and wine become the actual body and blood of Christ during Mass, and 42 percent couldn't name Genesis as the first book of the Bible. Only 47 percent of Protestants could identify Martin Luther as the writer who sparked the Protestant Reformation.  You can see the final report here.

Genesis

This may be why some kids think that the Easter bunny rose from the dead on Easter morning so he could deliver goodie baskets to all the children.

If you want to test yourself against the other Americans, you can take the test here.
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I think it is wonderful when adopted children find their biological parents.  It may not always be a good experience, but I think they should have an idea about their history whether it is for medical reasons or just to fill the void of knowing from where they came.  More often than not, there is a truly poignant story behind the relinquishment of a child. I wrote about my friend's story a couple years ago.

Last week a man discovered that his biological mother was most probably a women who for years had been part of a carnival side show.  She is a bearded lady.  That fact alone would make most people giggle, but as usual there is a bigger story.

She was born a hermaphrodite, part man/part woman, and doctors removed the male parts. Her father capitalized on his unusual daughter by having her work in sideshows.  She was told she could never bear a child.  His father was also a carnival worker who ran off with the baby and abandoned it in a motel several years later.  Her son found her with few clues in an Internet search.

 "I knew it was her as soon as I saw the picture online," he said. "We have a resemblance."


Mother and son have been reunited after over 33 years.  A DNA test is being conducted and the results, they hope, will be announced, where else - on the Maury Povich Show.
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The US President's Chief of Staff  has decided he wants to be mayor of Chicago.  There seems to be a little residency requirement in the way, but when has that ever stopped the inner circle of the Big City?
 
In order to run for office, a candidate must have lived in the city for a least a year, which means Rahm Emanuel should have been a resident of Chicago by February 22 of this year.  Unfortunately, when he left for Washington he leased his house to someone else, so his real home when he comes back to visit is probably a hotel room. The tenants won't give in to his requests to terminate the lease on his former domicile.
 

There's a bit more evidence in this election requirement snafu than his boss had with the question of his birth certificate. Someone only needs to object to his filing by November 30.  Otherwise his name will be placed on the ballot.  Will anyone have the guts to do it?

 

Wacky Wednesday Wisdom

Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics.  ~Author Unknown

They will talk about you later:

"I had a patient who had an overwhelming desire to eat phone books. Not all in one piece but page by page until it was all in. He was always coming in with bowel obstructions."


"The lady started to move uncomfortable on the bed so the nurse pulled her over to see if she needed cleaned up; well, it wasn't BM that was "smiling" at her, but the woman's upper denture!  She evidently had it stuffed almost all the way in!"



"A guy was brought in from a local disco club. Seems he had danced around so much that he passed out. When he came in, he had on those skin tight PVC pants and the "bulge" was huge. The pants were so tight that they had to be cut off him.( He was still unconscious at this point.) After cutting the pants off, we discovered what the huge bulge really was!! He had taped an Italian sausage to his thigh!!!! "

Tuesday Titillation - Bottoms up

Big bottoms used to be all the rage and women turned to bustles, corsets, and other devices to enhance their figures.

It's great news for many of us - big bottoms are back and the latest rage in bottom enhancement is cosmetic surgery.  You can put much of the blame on Jennifer Lopez, Beyonce, and the Mad Men's character of Joan.

Now tiny boy-shaped ladies are paying big bucks for big butts.

A Miami-based surgeon is actually pinning his hopes on this latest craze.  His name is Constantino Mendieta and he’s the inventor of the Miami Thong Lift.

Mendieta uses grafts of fat ­liposuctioned from the thighs or stomach, purified and then painstakingly injected — using a large needle — into the layers of muscle of the buttocks, changing their shape from flat to super-curvy and high, like Beyonce’s behind.

You can view a photo gallery of some of his patients here.

"Fat transfer is most successful when used in small quantities, as it needs to be ­surrounded by healthy tissue so it develops its own blood supply. Without that it will die and be re-absorbed by the body. If this happens unevenly, you could end up with one buttock larger than the other. There will also be bruising and swelling that can last for months. You will have serious hips for some time after the procedure."

Wouldn't that be nice? Spend thousands of dollars to bruise and beat your no butt body like this:

to get some serious sexy hips like this:

Or you could just start blogging, sit in front of a computer all day long for a year, and save some money.

Music Monday and Some Randomness

1.  I found out that there are people who actually read blogs on Saturdays, so I will continue my attempt to post something seven days week (at least until tax season when things might get readjusted). I will keep doing lazy memes on Sundays because I need one day each week that I don't have to think too hard.

2.  Last Photo Friday I posted pictures of my grandparents and wrote of my grandmother's "haunting eyes."  This was a bit of an inside joke to see how observant you are.  People were fascinated at my disclosure of being an amblyope and the one-eye-crossed face I can make.  Go back and look at my grandmother's eyes again and you'll notice her lazy left eye that I inherited.  Were you just being polite by not mentioning it or did you miss it altogether?

3.  Here's your Music Monday to start out the week.  From "3-2-1 Contact," a PBS children's show from the 1980's and featuring the distinctive voice of Leon Redbone:



4.  And a special happy birthday wish to my very own Annie Oakley (who loved watching "3-2-1 Contact" as a kid and has put all that knowledge from it to good use).

The "I've Been Tagged" Meme

From Sunday Stealing:

1. Where are you from?

 farm town, Illinois, USA, North America, Earth, Milky Way, Universe

2. If you could live any place in the world, where would you live?

A yellow submarine

3. What's your favorite blog? I'll check them out of course!

I don't play favorites - just pick one from the list on the left.

4. What is your biggest blogging pet peeve?

I don't want to hear about hot flashes, menopause, how stupid your spouse is, or how you hate your kids and/or other relatives. Also, keep the advertising to a minimum.  If a blog is overloaded with flashy advertising, I don't consider it a blog; it's your second job.

5. What's your favorite TV show this season? I need a new show! :)

"Breaking Bad" (I've said this before) and "Modern Family." "The Office" will always be #1.

6. What's your favorite 'down' time {nothing computer related}?

Going to auctions. It's amazing how strong my bladder is at an all day auction event. If you want a bargain, you can't take time for bathroom stops with me. Wear a diaper if you must.

7. Are you a parent? If so, what's your favorite thing to do with your children?

Yes, I'm a parent, but the kids are all grown-up, so my favorite thing is getting to spend any time with them.

8. What about your blog have you considered changing?

The design and layout, but I haven't had the time to fool with it.

9. What do you do for a living (if you work outside the home or if you work at home)?

I'm a Jill of all trades and a master of many.

10. What is your favorite song at the moment? What is your favorite song ever?

When you've been around a long time, you tend to have way too many favorites, so here's one I haven't mentioned in the blog before:



11. What is your favorite niche TV channel to watch?

Since I refuse to pay for TV, I'm limited to the no-niche broadcast networks. I'll get the other stuff through Netflix or on-line sources.

12. If you could have any career, what would it be and why?

Benevolent Dictator.  There would be no need for politicians.

13. What is your favorite outfit?

A black coat dress with leather trim similar to this:

I've had it nearly 20 years and it still looks great.

14. If you could tell your teenage self something, what would you say?

Don't believe them; high school is NOT going to be the best years of your life.

15. What is your biggest blog pet peeve?

You are being redundant. See #4

16. What is your favorite recipe?

Original

17. What is the funniest joke you've ever heard?
Well, it's the punniest:

A frog goes into a bank, and hops up to the loan officer.
The loan officer says, "My name is John Paddywack. Can I help you?"
The frog says, "Yeah, I'd like to borrow some money."
The loan officer finds this a little odd, but gets out a form. He says, "Okay, what's your name?"
The frog says, "Kermit Jagger."
The loan officer says, "Really? Any relation to Mick Jagger?"
The frog says, "Yeah, he's my dad."
The loan officer says, "Okay. Ummm...do you have any collateral?"
The frog hands the loan officer a pink ceramic elephant and says, "Will this do?"
The loan officer says, "Hmmm...I'm not sure. Let me go check with the bank manager."
The frog says, "Oh, tell him I said hi. He knows me."
The loan officer goes back to the manager and says, "Excuse me, but there's this frog out there named Kermit Jagger who wants to borrow some money. All he has for collateral is this pink elephant thing, I'm not even sure what it is."

The manager says, "It's a knick-knack, Paddywack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."



18. What is your favorite vacation spot and why?

It's good to keep reminding yourself about the origins of this country.

19. What are you most excited about with fall here?



20. Did you envision yourself to be where you are today ten years ago? If not, what did you envision?

Yes, I'm right where I knew I'd be - in the middle of Nowhere.



21. If money were no object, what would your dream house look like?

Something that looks like a post office.

22. What is your all-time favorite Disney movie?

This really dates me:  Old Yeller .  It was made back when Disney movies were truly good family entertainment.

23. What's your favorite blog to read? Or a blog you think isn't getting enough notice?

This meme is repetitively redundant.  See #3

Saturday Post Time

I'm never sure if I should write a post for Saturdays.  Does anyone ever read blogs on Saturday? Or for that matter does anyone read blogs at all since facebook and twitter?  Other bloggers have asked similar questions:

"And of course I hear how blogs are dying....  I'm too wordy and personal for facebook though.  I figure I'm an acquired taste and don't like to ASSUME anyone will want to read me..."  (The Sandwich Life)

I'm right there with you, Cynthia.

The statistics here say that there are a few people reading this blog, but the majority are other bloggers.  Yes, we read each other's blogs for entertainment and knowledge or just plain nosiness, but we also read them for reciprocal love. We all say that we only write for ourselves, but along comes the admiration of a fellow writer and boom, our egos get hooked on raising those readership numbers. Then some even start thinking they can earn money doing this.




I have been fortunate enough to meet a couple of fellow bloggers, and although we may disagree on many things (especially politics), we have found common-ground that gets us through some enjoyable lunches together.  It's a mutual admiration society of writers.



I do have a few non-blogging readers.  One person likes it so much she has had links to it on her facebook page, and now she has become my new best facebook friend. You did hear me right -one person. I've never met her, but she appears to be a very, very interesting person and SHE LIKES ME!

But I digress. Back to Saturday postings - Aren't blog readers too busy with errand-running, yard work, farmers markets, home-town events, football games, and children's activities on Saturdays?  Or do they check their phones or other portable devices in between activities and spend 30 seconds reading a post the blogger has spent 10 minutes or more writing?

Just as you suspected, this is a test.  If you're reading this, leave a comment, even if it just says "I'm here." I'd like to see how many people read blogs on a Saturday - well, this blog anyway. Besides, I need to calibrate my stat counter.

Photo Friday - from the family album

I have always loved these pictures of my paternal grandparents.  I may be very biased, but I think that they were a rather striking couple in their youth.

This is a picture of my grandmother taken in 1900 at the age of 14. Her eyes are mysteriously haunting and almost sad, don't you think?

This is my grandfather who was a bit older, but I think this picture was taken not many years after my grandmother's photo from above.  As a young adult, he worked for a while as a trolley conductor in Chicago and someone must have convinced him to be photographed in his uniform.

Both grandmother and grandfather had the same last name, but were not related.  The immigrant Swedes, like others at the time, didn't like their children to marry outside the nationality.  Things changed by the next generation; their younger son married my mother who was of Norwegian and German descent.

My grandfather's family members were tall; my grandmother's family members were short. Today's generation of the family have both, and I have the distinction of being the shortest of them all.