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Friday, December 19, 2008

A little education on etiquette

As someone with a different last name than my spouse, I am constantly annoyed at this time of year when I receive holiday cards addressed incorrectly. It seems that relatives. on my side of the family in particular, just don't seem to know proper etiquette. So here's a review for them and any one else who just can't get over that two people can be married and have different names or titles.

If the husband and wife have different last names, address the card to Mr. John Brown with Ms. Mary Smith directly below. Do not hyphenate their last names unless they are legally known as Smith-Brown or Brown-Smith.

If the husband and wife have the same last names, address the card to Mr. and Mrs. John Brown.

If the husband and wife have the same title (i.e. medical doctor), address the card to Dr. John Brown and Dr. Mary Smith or The Doctors Brown (if both have the same last name). Do not address the card to Dr. and Mrs. John Brown.

If the wife has a title, address the card to Mr. John Brown and Dr. Mary Smith, or Mr. John Brown and Dr. Mary Brown, but not Mr. and Dr. John Brown.

If the wife has a higher rank (i.e. military), her name should be first.

Now, how hard is that?

5 comments:

Going Like Sixty said...

So let's have a little fun:

Gay couple.

John Smith Jr. is a PhD., and Sam Jones, M.D.

How tall is their dog?

Merry Christmas Ms. Catch Her!

:)

Catch Her in the Wry said...

If I remember correctly, it would be:
Dr. Sam Jones
Mr. John Smith, Jr.

alphabetically and only MDs get the "Dr." title on envelopes.

As for the dog, probably about 6 inches with a big head. Say, don't you have something similar that is really hairy? I think you call it Sophi.

Anonymous said...

How about Ms. Mary Smith with Mr. John Brown directly below. Don't women go before men? Seems fair to me.

Catch Her in the Wry said...

Unless, things have changed, it has always been my understanding that men come first when addressing envelopes. The only exception is when the woman out-ranks the man, as in the military.
Ladies are first for everything except envelopes.Don't know why.

Going Like Sixty said...

Yes, Sofi is correct. But just for the record, I am married to a woman.

:)