If you think it's about cooking, you'd be wrong

These are our tools of the trade. When used correctly, they have consistently performed the task successfully.

The tongs were a new addition to the cookie sheet and baking pan in our latest venture. The critter was hiding in a corner, with the cat on the ground licking its chops. My former technique of placing the baking pan over it and sliding the cookie sheet under it as a lid, trapping the thing, just wouldn't work. So the long-handled barbecue tongs came in handy. One of us squeezed the thing and placed it in the pan, while I was in charge of quickly placing the cookie sheet over it as a temporary lid. We walked with equipment in hand to the door and let it go. You can't kill these things, they are too good for the environment:

My very first experience with a bat in the house occurred at my parents' house a couple decades ago. It was Christmas Eve and we were all opening presents in front of the fireplace, when a bat swooped out of the garland draped on the mantel. After flying the length of the living room and back several times and appropriately scaring the crap out of everyone, it finally rested quietly on a wall. Being the creative and bravest one in the family, I grabbed the above equipment and was successful in relocating it on the first try.

Ten years later, a bat appeared in my own house. I used the same equipment as before and it worked quite well again. This is now the third time we've been successful, so I am offering this special technique to you free of charge, but it's a do-it-yourself project, because I don't make house calls.

I thought about changing equipment this time and instead use a golf club like my blog friend, but baking pan, cookie sheet and tongs don't make holes in the wall or splatter blood everywhere.

I live in a grand old home so I suppose I should expect problems like this will arise periodically, but my house is looks much, much different than this: