Finally he quits!

The only thing worse than a politician is a career politician. He hadn't had a real job since 1945.   If you're a politician long enough, you'll play both sides of the fence: yes, Vietnam War; no, Iraq War; no, Civil Rights Act; yes, KKK (apology later); yes civil rights legislation.

Nearly 50 years on the taxpayers' dime and  boastful of his tag line "King of Pork..." 

“I hope to become West Virginia’s billion-dollar industry."

This was not public service. This was a public disgrace.

Alice doesn't live here any more, thank goodness!

Alice Cooper singing disco?  Check him out in this 1978 film, Sextette, an embarrassing last film for Mae West. Kinda makes you want to strut and wiggle your behind.

(I think I better get my hair cut soon. I'm beginning to look like 84 year old Mae from this movie. Yikes!)

For you Alice Cooper fans, here's something better.

My Friday evening

There's nothing quite like seeing a couple in love. The eyes gazing, the hand holding, the brush of a cheek. 

But when it evolves into heavy petting in public, it becomes disturbing

especially while you're eating

and the couple is quite grey and wrinkled.

Oviously they were having an affair

at a well-lit all you can eat Chinese buffet.

Change of life

Yesterday I went to a luncheon honoring a friend who is retiring from a position in the public school system.  We were asked to write down a piece of advice to her about retirement.  Here's what I told her:



She'll probably be bored out of her mind within six months.  She's still young, fun, attractive and active. Even a part-time job doing something she loves won't really seem like a job.  Note that I didn't say get a new career. That would be too much work.

Recycling Tip

Just in case someone leaves a dead animal head in your bed some evening, here's one way to reuse and recycle it:

All this talk about getting old is getting old

With all the baby-boomers now entering senior citizen status, it has become the media rage to explore aging and provide information on how to cope with the inevitable.

Oprah apparently has been featuring older women (50+) and giving them a stage to offer advice on embracing aging (mostly via plastic surgery, botox, and anti-aging creams).  "Brilliantly aging women" is the tagline. Yesterday she featured Raquel Welch, 69.

Yes, she has fully embraced the experience of wrinkles, grey hair, droopy eyelids and marionette mouth, don't you think?

Now Dame Helen Mirren, 65, a very fine British actress, has posed topless. You can view the entire slide show here, fully exposed ta-tas and all. She, for one, actually seems to be embracing aging by showing us how dementia can affect judgment.

Jesus Struck by Lightning

Just more evidence showing the lunacy of religion.  Jesus doesn't know it's dangerous to stand out in the open and near water during a thunderstorm.

 "Jesus is on fire.  It's amazing."

But they're just so stinkin' cute

Daughter #2, Annie Oakley, who can ride and shoot, has added critter trapping to her resume.  Fortunately there were no defensive moves on the part of the furry creatures.

Mamma and two babies are now properly relocated. 

Words to live by:  Never get into a pissing fight with a skunk.

Odor-able Kitty

Know thyself.

A recent seminar I attended discussed strategies of dealing with various personality types based on the Myers-Briggs testing.  We all took a shortened version of the test and the overall results were close to world population averages, with a bit of skewing toward type ESFJ, the emotional and social personality type.  It was not surprising to the speaker since the majority of the audience was socially conscious non-profit organization executives and staff.

I have taken the test many times, in short and long forms, and the result is always the same:  INTJ.  For my personality type, this particular speaker was using words like visionary, problem-solver, wizard, and mastermind. I like to think I know myself very well, but I've never thought of myself in those terms, more as a big-picture, rational thinking, analytical, independent loner.

He pointed out that INTJs hate being bogged down with minute details and micro-management and have much difficulty dealing with other personalities who love it.  I already knew that; I was married to someone like that for 12 years and that's exactly why it didn't last.  And you should see me after a particular elderly client makes his regular stop in my office and spends 90 minutes telling me EVERY SINGLE, LITTLE THING he's done and thought that day (from shit to shinola, I kid you not).

Too much information!!!!!!

I must admit I rather liked the images conjured up by the speaker's INTJ description so...

You can call me Visionary.

You can call me Problem Solver.

You can call me Wizard.

(Pay no attention to the woman behind the curtain)

You can call me Mastermind.

 But, " you doesn't have to call me Johnson."

We all make bad decisions at one time or another

I have been occupied with meetings, seminars, continuing education, transporting parents and meals, and painting a garage.

Yesterday I had a choice of things to do:

Spend some quality time with good friends in Chicago and be in the audience of Nate Berkus' new tv show

or spend 7 hours at a conference listening to dry presentations on "leadership."

Because I had prepaid the registration fee for the conference and topics were directly related to both my occupation and my volunteer work, I felt I must choose the latter.

As a result, I came home feeling like this

instead of this

Current Events Observations

1.  What happened to the exhilaration of seeing the power of gushing oil? 

If oil companies were allowed to drill above ground in remote areas,  capping a gushing well wouldn't be nearly as difficult as capping one a mile under water.  There would also most likely be much less environmental damage if an accident occurred and certainly an easier clean-up.

2.  Al and Tipper are separating.  Could he have finally decided to step out of the closet?

That news would be just as surprising as when Clay Aiken announced that indeed he is gay.

3. If you're a drunk and desperate Duchess, it is quite all right for a journalist to capture an entrapment on hidden camera.  If you're a US senator, well, that's a different matter.